>.< >.¬ ≥.≤

Today was Mediocre.

I'm not talking about a day that was bland or pointless or unexciting. Today was Mediocre in the way that that horned fellow in the pits of Hell is Lucifer.

I went to a class today, on How to Succeed at a Job Interview. The gist of the lecture was that, in order to get a job, you must become the best cocksucker around. You must suck more cock than the other guy, and you must suck it like it was a job in and of itself. I got a yoyo at the end.

The idea that my best chance to get a job before August lies in being a salesman of myself does not sit well with me. It doesn't even stand well with me. It is currently bent over a barrel of my vast knowledge of electronic gadgetry whilst my ideals and my honesty take turns railing it up the ass. If I don't get a job because I didn't market myself properly, fuck the job.

And you know the fun part? There are people out in the world who would read this post and say "You'll get used to whoring yourself out."

And you know the scary part? I might have to.




Hello bed.

funcky!

World of Warcraft In-Game Food Delivery Service.

A hunting party (one of whom will have both the leatherworking and skinning professions) will grind turtles, boars, wolves, whatever drops cookable meat. They give the raw materials to a group of mages (profession: cooking: 300) who cook it into several dozen edible meals. A customer IMs one of our Customer Representatives (prolly onna tha mages) who then assembles the food order and uses their Teleport spells to get out to the area quickly. The customer is charged for teleport and labor costs, with a considerable discount on conjured foodstuffs. The shiny? Each meal delivery comes with a free Heavy Leather Ball.



Why. Is this. In my head.

Fun with downtime!

Q: Why did the physicist bash the baby's head open?

A: He was looking for his lost kitty.


It goes like this: For whatever opinion you hold, the human mind can easily comprehend an opinion that runs opposite of that viewpoint. If a mind can desire world peace, it can also desire the destruction of the world. Simple. But, say you haven't made up your mind on something, or better yet, you don't know someone else's opinion. It's the Schrodinger's Cat experiment all over again!

Construct a situation where a person's opinion has a 50% chance of being swayed either way, and that you cannot observe their final decision. (The entire "different people has different views" bit makes it hard to find a stimulus that will definitely give a solid X or Y response, but we're talking hypothetically here, dammit.) The question behind this is, do their mental processes enter a state of quantum flux? Do they count as an observer?

Were this to be performed in the real world, the ideal test subjects would be babies, as they have fewer methods of expressing themselves (older humans are inherently versed in body language, making even the act of looking at them a technical act of response observation.) This presents us with the most glorious of theoretical outcomes ever; if you don't know the baby's opinion of the stimuli, and the child will forget about the experiment when it is old enough to communicate, then you (and the baby, the only possible observer) never know the decision it made. The quantum waveform never collapses.



Heeeeeee.

commentation on comic for 2005-06-25.

I am so very proud that nothing drastic happened in this comic. Dear lord, I'm DEVELOPING CHARACTERS.

y'know...

sort of...


Dude! Look! Behind you! Wookiees!



*flee*

Randomness!

Because it won't leave my head without a keyboard or a bullet.

Dungeons and Dragons Magical Item: VEST OF INFINITE KITTENS

Function: Grants the wearer the ability to pull out 1d4 kittens per hour from the vest's pockets. These kittens have a variety of uses. They can serve as a diversionary tactic (flinging at the face of an opponent requires a Dex roll, and will cause 1d2-1 damage upon impact), a diplomatic aid (+1 to all Charisma rolls. +2 if the target is female, but +0 if target is a catgirl), and is a suitable subject for the task of wizard's familiar (but with a -1 to all rolls, as it is still just a kitten). Alternatively, by ripping open the pockets, you can summon 200d4 kittens instantly. This action will destroy the vest and any catnip in a five-mile radius. This item is not to be confused with the Robe of the Endless Void or the Poncho of Unlimited Puppies.

hi there!

No posts for a while, too busy with... stuff. Useful stuff. And cookies.

commentation on post for 2005-06-13.

The original versions of this kept leading to a trash bin. I don't know why.

well fuck me with a razor blade.

The long story: The world is full of predators, people hellbent on being the fastest, most effective hunting machines alive. If you do not dedicate every breathe and twitch to a singular activity, they will destroy you en masse should you engage in it. They are heartless, vicious animals whose bloodlust knows not compassion nor pity. They are the reason our species is alive, and they are the reason our species is being held back. I, for one, take great personal pride in that I am not a part of their mindless numbers.



The short story: I couldn't get the tickets to Serenity, because they sold out in under 10 minutes. Fuckin' fanboys, staying at home for 30+ hours just to camp a website for material goods. How dare they steal my schtick!

Now if you will excuse me, I have some fetal-position-sleeping to do.

commentation on comic for 2005-06-09.

oh hey.