Randomness!

Because it won't leave my head without a keyboard or a bullet.

Dungeons and Dragons Magical Item: VEST OF INFINITE KITTENS

Function: Grants the wearer the ability to pull out 1d4 kittens per hour from the vest's pockets. These kittens have a variety of uses. They can serve as a diversionary tactic (flinging at the face of an opponent requires a Dex roll, and will cause 1d2-1 damage upon impact), a diplomatic aid (+1 to all Charisma rolls. +2 if the target is female, but +0 if target is a catgirl), and is a suitable subject for the task of wizard's familiar (but with a -1 to all rolls, as it is still just a kitten). Alternatively, by ripping open the pockets, you can summon 200d4 kittens instantly. This action will destroy the vest and any catnip in a five-mile radius. This item is not to be confused with the Robe of the Endless Void or the Poncho of Unlimited Puppies.